Self-Sabotage & Self-Doubt

“It’s not who you are that holds you back, it’s who you think you’re not”

Constantly, (subconsciously & consciously) we disqualify ourselves in life while simultaneously projecting our thoughts and feelings into the atmosphere, creating fabricated stories and thoughts. We put obstacles in our own paths!! We get in our own way to a point where our goals and true passions aren’t being met. In addition, we don’t always think we are good enough or deserving of certain things or people and I am here to say…YOU ARE WORTH EVERY GOOD THING THAT IS COMING YOUR WAY, and don’t feel bad about it.

I can admit, I have self-sabotaged/self-doubted myself plenty of times before, in my past and recently. I can’t give you a direct answer as to why I do this, but I will say that I don’t always feel 100% worthy. Now that I think about it, I’m pretty sure it’s because I am afraid of failing at something, resistance, the need to be in control, and or because somethings makes me uncomfortable…BOOM, epiphanies! So, I would procrastinate or find reasons not to commit to something because of this imaginary fear of failing at it. I sometimes discredit myself before I even allow something or someone in my life because it feels unfamiliar or “too good to be true”. I tell myself things that would stop me from taking a step out on faith or stepping out of my comfort zone. Don’t get me wrong, all areas in my life aren’t this way & I am working on certain things so that I can live my best life with no apologies. I have found myself getting so excited about something and then the next day, I’m psyching myself out.. UGGHHHH

According to personal experience & psychology today here are a few other reasons to why we may self-sabotage or have self-doubt in general:

• Escaping emotions/feelings
• Procrastination- “the gap between intention and action”
• Addiction- Drugs, alcohol, etc
• Unfamiliarity/discomfort
• Guilt
• “Too good to be true”
• Perceived fraudulence
• Control
• Laziness
• Boredom
• Fear of intimacy or rejection
• Fear of abandonment

Areas in life where we may Self-Sabotage & or have Self-Doubt:

• As a parent- if you have children
• In relationships (dating, marriage, friendships, etc)
• At work
• At school
• With finances
• Success

What we must realize or do in order to remove this negative stigma and begin to live the lives we were meant to live?

• Realize that YOU have the permission to go where you want to go and to do what you want to do.
• Realize that everyone has a different starting point and all of our paths are not meant to go in the same direction.
• Focus on the actions more than the outcomes
• Realize that mistakes are meant to be made and failing at things is inevitable
• Embrace your feelings and find out ways in which you can do so without judging yourself
• Don’t lose yourself trying to sacrifice yourself for someone else
• Don’t compare your life to someone else’s!
• Ask yourself why and other questions to see where this behavior is coming from (figure out why & when)

 

STOP HOLDING YOURSELF HOSTAGE TO YOUR OWN THOUGHTS